Devoid of gentle concession

And the number one cause of depression

Invercargill to Whangarei, NCEA students

All have to say: Unfamiliar Text sucks.

You get a few paragraphs; there’s a main idea

And it strikes a full room of students with fear

You reread and reread, but you’re nowhere near

Untangling this web of words. 

You’ve an hour and a half, I guess

To read through three Kiwi texts, no less

To search and scan and cry and try

To figure out what it all means.

What techniques are used,

And the changes in mood,

And the purpose behind

All the words that they’ve spewed. 

All the metaphors and similes

That I decode abysmally

See NZQA’s villainy?

I sigh and sulk so timidly. 

But perhaps it’s not so bad

Perhaps it can be done

Perhaps if I just breathe a bit

It could even be fun?

Perhaps I’m being rude 

To a paper that must be

So thoughtfully planned.

Maybe I should think before

I bury my head in the sand.

Maybe if I concentrate,

I’ll get a decent grade.

I’m hoping and I’m hoping

And I pray, and pray, and pray.